Sometimes I feel that I do not understand myself.. I do not know what I really want in life.. I can be given the toughest job and yet after moaning and whining over it, I will try to produce the best solution and solve the problem and make it seems as though nothing has happen. But sometimes when given the easiest job I cant even do it well.. What's wrong with me.. I can't communicate well with people.. I do not understand people in my team. I canot even communicate well with hwee chin. I can not stand people who can not following up with my pace or being very much slower than me.. But yet when faced with different people.. I will try and adapt to the way they do things and even though I do not like it, I will not say it out. Bottle-ing up my feelings and making myself feel so stress and bad all day long. I do not like people tapping or touching my shoulders but yet when it happens I cant do anything about it other than showing a pissed look. But how will it help? I don't see a point of me reacting this way. I am a sensitive idiot.. The smallest thing can become a big deal to me. I am a harsh and playful guy.. I am so playful that people do not see that when I am serious and when I am joking around. I may be caring, fun and loving but when compared, being harsh and playful brings all that down. I maybe playful and noisy at times but there is also the quiet side of me which u wouldn't want to experience as it is too scary for human to take it. I am a person full of confidence but when time comes that I do not want to lose something I wanna achieve I will bring my self down instead of pushing myself futher. what people say does matter alot to me, be it constructive or destructive. I always believe things happen for a reason, and its always after a long time than a eruption will occur. Problems do not arise just overnite, its because we didn't notice the small cracks that leads to the collapsed to a wall. I do not see a reason in this post. I do not understand what I am writing. Its all jus come to me and my fingers are punching the buttons on the keyboard lyk no control. hope that is because am I really over stressing myself with all the projects rather than that having some problems with me.. but wat if its the latter? what is its tt I am too stress? but now I do not feel the stress. I dont feel anything, I am jus emotion-less now. Lost for words to describe what and how I feel now. I cant think of anything. I am suppose to type the qns for tml's meeting with DXO's effen but I am here in the mist of finding back my emotions, trying to understand myself. guess I need a jog now.. Thanks for wasting time reading this stupid and ridiculous post. I am off for a jog. see hw I feel later den post again