Edited:

Gosh! I calculated, this whole week i slept less than 13hrs in total including the weekends.. had a super hectic training schedule with lectures that dragged all the way till almost midnight and offshore trainings that end way PASS midnight and with just a 3hrs nap before the next day. no doubt it was a super shagged week but i must say the experience was up there.. Finally im no more a status personal. But i injured my wrist again.. haaahaaa...

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What could be worse than being awaken by a phone call Sat early morning (when u already had a very very horrendous Friday night) to tell u someone dear is at the brink of dying.. How would u react to it.. A usual sat morning swim turn out to be his last day on this planet earth.. As investigation shows he was still semi-conscious when the lifeguard was attending to him, even on the ambulance it showed signs of improvement. BUT WHY when he was sent to CGH he died? YES i am here trying very hard to not think that CGH is FUCKED UP. But even paramedic friends say they have saw how FUCKED UP the CGH A&E department is.. Its not difficult for me to come to a conclusion that they left him there, then came back to find a motionless body tried a few cycles of CPR and then time check.. Pronounce dead at 1044am. Cause: heart Failure.
Going down to the void deck now... Uncle's is on the way back.
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1600hrs:
Just came up from the void deck with all the rituals done. Just saw the Certificate of death, cause: Ischaemic heart disease. If i didn't remember wrongly it should be something like reduced blood supply to the heart or something like that. But having said that.. He is so healthy, doing exercise almost daily, health screening showing nothing, no close family members having this problem where did this came from. with no pain and discomfort highlighted to the paramedic on site. I tried to ask. But all i got was, its alright. its all over now.... No im not trying to find fault or pinpoint anyone i just want to know what happened to him.

1700hrs:
NOW this pisses me off.. Mum just told me, the anatomist said there are such cases where no signs of chest pain or other symptoms. but then why was he sent to the hospital at 0940 and only attended at 1010. Or unless u tell me he was already alright then suddenly his heart failed him? IO said these kind of cases would be brought to court. What am i suppose to feel now.. There's so much i don't understand, so much i want to but don't know of. So much of emptiness in me.


A BIG side note:
Its' just been 2 days of work and so much happened.. You said it was me who made u go there so often now. I'm sorry. Since yesterday I've made up my mind u will NEVER EVER SEE me step into that area anymore.

Ps: I gave it to u ONCE, u left it on the table unattended i thought alright maybe was that china girl fault. Gave it to u the SECOND time, I saw with my own eye having it go up in FLAMES. What more can i say. I need no explanation you are not oblige to give. So I waited, alright maybe there was a little mis-communication there, i wanted to leave but you've to please others by eating chicken wings drinking tom yum soup so i waited. Doze off thinking u will wake me up when u are done. NO, I woke up when my friend called wanted to pick us up. I asked u to leave that was at 3.45, 2hrs late. You said 2 more songs so we all waited. That two songs seems forever. Meanwhile mum still constantly is calling on and off. 5am exactly 4hrs after my supposing-ly reached home timing but I'm still stand outside chamber. Mum called again. GOT FUCKING PISSSSED of waiting and ASKING people IF they want to leave.
So off i went and what i got? "if u are treating me this way. So be it".
Think about this, i can close my eye and describe you from YOUR hair to toe, say out at least 5 things u like and dislike. Could you do like wise? Maybe that's what friends are. To be selfless to another party but aint the feeling of not appreciated just SUCK? Oh well maybe we should settles for the least and that way we would feel so much better...

Alright that's all for today I'm really tired but I've to go down now. Anyway I'm booking in tml 7am, coming out Tuesday evening and going back Wednesday night. This would be a short and wayward week in Seletar camp.

Ps 2: i just suddenly remembered u told me to find the song myself cause it was a song for him.